Anger is a BIG word! It is loaded with bad vibes and discomfort, both for the person who is angry and the people around them. It is a fact that we will all feel angry at times, due to the way we as Human Beings process information. We are built to feel a myriad of emotions from awe, to sadness, to joy, to peace, to anger. This is how we know we are alive!! If the Anger is still there 15 minutes later though, it is about you and your beliefs, because emotions are meant to come and go, even those you wish would stay. Emotions are energy, that comes and passes away, if we don't keep adding more thoughts to it. So!! The truth is, "If it sticks, it is yours!" Your past Anger has been triggered and what a wonderful opportunity to take responsibility and clear this Anger for good!

So today we are talking about anger that sticks. Meaning... you get angry a lot, you can't let anger go when you get angry or you know you are an angry person.

For Anger to be an issue for you...

• You have been conditioned at a young age that yourself and others should/could have acted a different way at the time.
• You have learnt and believe a lot of rules about how you and others should act and behave in certain situations.
• You ruminate a lot about the way you or others have behaved and this keeps the anger going.
• You believe that if you or others acted better or did a different thing, the outcome would have been as you wished.
• You operate from could've, should've, if I'd style of thinking.

It is a fact and reality, that at any given moment we are always acting the best that we can with the information we have so far (meaning our genetics and all the information and experiences we have had in this lifetime). You or the other could not be acting better, doing better and you are not supposed to be acting better or doing better. You are on this earth as part of evolution. If you are alive, you are always teaching and always learning. This is the nature of life. This does not mean that your actions don't have consequences! Your actions always have consequences!! For example, the person you believe is acting poorly will have consequences to their behaviour, even though they may not be the consequences that you wish for. It is no different for yourself. If you are continually angry in the present, this will have consequences for you and your future. This is the way the Universe works, as everything is Energy, including yourself.

When you understand that nobody including yourself could have acted any different at anytime, this creates acceptance rather than Anger. It is only in hindsight, when you know things haven't gone how you believe they should, that you are now looking backwards and picking on actions and behaviours. If everything went as you believed it should or could have, you wouldn't be picking and doing Anger at yourself or others.

When you are Angry, all it is is a giant pool of could've / should've/ if I'd thinking! This is inaccurate thinking. It isn't working for you or the other. How do we know?? Because you are angry. This way of thinking is an unconscious habit, because you have thought like that so many times now that it is unconscious, just like driving a car. For example, you may have sat there angry as a little one, thinking the same angry things over and over again and now they are a habit. A habit that isn't working for you as an adult.

Something else that is very important to note regarding anger, is that underneath anger sits a whole lot of hurt. Because you believed that the other should've behaved differently and they didn't, this is now very personal. You are now feeling hurt. When you reflect on this hurt you become more and more angry. As mentioned earlier, this may have been a habit that you developed in childhood and that you are still unconsciously using now. Another example maybe that someone caused you to feel helpless or useless when you were young and it felt bad and you believed they shouldn't have done that. So you become angry and then later on in life, it becomes an unconscious habit that when you feel helpless, you feel instantly angry.

Let look at some tools and strategies for changing anger to acceptance next week. :-)