Sometimes, no matter how we plan, unexpected situations occur in our lives and we feel overwhelmed by stress and we may need some extra help to call on. 

So now we are going to simplify Stress and provide some simple strategies and tools for Stress overload.

 

Stress is:

• The gap between what we believe should be happening and what is really happening.  
• Expectation versus Acceptance.
• An automatic reaction to change and things that are unknown to us.

The simple truth is that, we are not accepting what is really happening and we want it to go the way we want.

This is Reality butting up against our Belief System!!

Which one is real?

Reality is!!  Since Reality is what is happening now, you need to accept what is happening and move on from there.  This may involve getting help to make change, using tools and strategies, setting goals and Emotional Intelligence.

We have been conditioned to try and control Reality and blame things outside of ourselves.  This may work sometimes.  It is also tiring.

Today I offer three key skills for reducing overwhelming stress and various tools and strategies for these.

Quick Stress Relief

​1.  Become aware of and use your senses.  What do you see, hear, feel, taste and smell?  It is even better if you indulge your senses with things you love, such as looking at your favourite photos or hugging your pet.  Or become aware of your Breath.  Immediately you have just reconnected with life, the earth, as this is how we connect, with our senses.  You have come out of your head and into your body.

2.  Catch yourself in your Stress Story!  And stop it!!  You can keep thinking like that if you like.  If you do though, expect the same results.  Once you come to the understanding that this is a choice, you are half way there!  

3.  Set one small goal and do something different. 

4.  Remind yourself that “This Too Shall Pass.”  It is the nature of life.

5.  Move!  This may mean do some exercise or take a stroll in nature.  It may also mean to keep moving, no matter how bad you feel.  Never give up.

6.  Each day list five things you are grateful for or that you appreciate.

Be Yourself and Love Yourself

1.  Be Yourself!!   Practice the tools of courage, compassion and connection to live wholeheartedly as your imperfect self. 

2.  This means waking up each day and reminding yourself that “You are enough” and that “You are worthy of love and belonging.”

3.  Practice doing things that represent loving yourself.  It may be a lovely massage or spending time with those you love.  It may be finding some quiet time for you.

4.  Practice laughing at your imperfections and sharing them with others.  Voicing these always, always helps.

5.  Remind yourself that you are not your behavior.  Your behaviour is a result of you conditioning.  You are far greater than your conditioning.

Emotional Connection

When we emotionally disconnect from ourselves, others and life, we are contributing to our Stress.

1.  Understanding the influence your thoughts have on your emotions.  Start to notice how you feel when you are thinking positively and how you feel when you are confused and thinking negative thoughts.  Remind yourself that this awareness is where “Choice” lies.

2.  When you notice the urge to disconnect from others, there is usually shame present and you are feeling less about yourself in some way.  This is when you do the opposite.  You must connect with a friend and have the courage to share your Story. 

3.  Connect with nature.  This may mean simply looking out of your window or going for a walk.  Indulge your senses as you do this.

4.  Do some mindfulness, meditation or yoga. Reconnect with yourself and life by reconnecting with your senses and breath.

5.  When you notice you have shut down.  Ask for help!

6.  Practice connecting if you are stressed and a loner.  It is no different to practicing soccer.

**Next week we will talk about Goals and how closely linked to your Stress they are.